In the end it’s the tiny little things that matter for us and makes us feel understood and loved. All we ever want is to be understood I believe. When we’re not getting the response we’re looking for when we tell about our day, about that amazing trip we made or a tiny detail about some delicious food we’ve tried, slowly but surely we forget to share. When we don’t share our excitement with the ones we love, slowly but surely our passions wither away. Unknowingly.
All you need to do is to listen more to people around you, what are they really saying behind the stories and the words. There’s a long lost child’s perspective, and children get hurt for the tiniest littlest things. That we carry on throughout our adulthood without always knowing. Just be mindful. Listen. The connection will come naturally.
If you can’t show this sort of compassion to the ones around you, you’re not really paying attention to what’s really going on under the surface. What’s true. What really matters in the end.
Jag måste få skriva ner lite tankar som dök upp medans Jonas Hassan Khemiri nämnde en sak på TV. Om en människa är vilsen eller förlorad, och inte har så många minnen kvar, skulle det synas på en kroppsscanning? Existerar minnen endast i min hjärna eller delar man minnen på en annan dimensionen med den man skapade minnena med? Om den person man skapat minnen med, inte existerar längre, försvinner även de minnena eftersom man är ensam om de nu?
Since my teenage years I’ve always been very interested in knowing people from all over the world via the Internet communities. It used to be so friendly to create great friendships over the web through forums and online communities back in the days. I feel as though those times have changed and it’s not as simple to get to know people with same type of interests as you since forums are not as popular as they used to. Now we have Youtube and we have Facebook groups, they fill the function but they are not as personal.
I remember being part of mailing lists for certain subjects that are so specific that you almost require people that have sought out this place to feel a real and honest connection. It was true and pure. I quite miss those times sometimes or feel the need to try to recreate them in other ways through blogs, Youtube and other social media.
Some of my deepest connections have been with people I’ve gotten to know online through common interests or kept chatting with online to remain friends despite living in different ends of the world. Maybe it’s because we really truly get to know the person’s inner core of what they value and what they want and how their true personality is, without the need for superficiality. What is better than a real deep conversation that spans over subjects from heaven to earth?
What if we didn’t have the means to be able to communicate during the time we’re not in the same place on Earth? We wouldn’t be able to stay in touch or actually know the people anymore, because time would have made the connections fade away. That’s why I’ve always appreciated the technology that allows us to keep in contact with friends and family all over the world.
I know reality is far from the tv-series Friends and maybe that’s a very unrealistic way of living and knowing your friends, but I wonder how it would be if everyone were in the same city. Being spread all over the world is also a barrier to really keep the contact frequent and close. Despite all of this I still believe that if you can get through these barriers and still manage to find the time and make the effort to stay connected, I think these types of friendships are stronger than others.
There is, unfortunately, these days, not so easy to find deep connections with people. It seems as though the everyday life is only able to focus on the surface. Rushing through life without stopping to reflect, think and to connect with others – that’s a shame.
So stop for a second and just appreciate those you care about around you, and spend time with them, be present with them, listen and leave your other thoughts behind.
There’s an old tradition in India to look up the horoscope and analyse a newborn’s star sign to predict major happenings in his/her life. Despite being born in quite a modern Indian family, and being born in Sweden, I still received an analyse of my future life which is called a “Janmpatri”. It’s a booklet which is consisting of a lot of astrology readings. This might seem odd and quite frankly a bit dreamy, but it’s very common.
My booklet is written in Hindi so I can’t unfortunately read it myself without the help of my parents. I know of some of the incidents which are written in my booklet that should have already happened. The funny thing is that they’re usually very precise of when the happenings will occur. I got a little brother at the age of 8 after many years of waiting. That was written in the astrology booklet amongst other things. The age of when I’d get married and about boyfriends and how they’d be.
Being a Piscean I’ve always been interested in astrology and spiritual topics. I’ve always been a seeker looking for answers in my life. Why do some things happen? What are we here on Earth to do? What is the meaning of life? I asked these questions very early on in my teens and could lie awake at night just pondering on these life topics. I think it’s one of the things that has driven me to be more keen to always be open to new knowledge. It’s helped me tons.
One lady once did a tarot reading for me and unfortunately she thought I was already above 18 and at the time I was actually 16. I remember that her reading up until the age of 16 made a lot of sense, and it gave hints to what I had already been through. But when I continued reading it didn’t make a lot of sense anymore to me, it seemed to be wrong or something. I remember going back to her to let her know that I was 16 and I thought she might have mixed up my age.
The interesting part here is that I kept that letter with the tarot interpretation and left it for a few years before I accidentally saw it again after I was over 20. I was amazed and shocked at the same time. Those things, she had described happening around the age of 16-20, they had all come true, in one way or another.
One could argue that it was all in my sub-conscious but it only works for an extent, not the whole list of things. There were people I had met, people who’d hurt me and my mental state of mind – all of the things that I had no real control over (not that I was aware at least). I found it truly interesting that sometimes fate decides the path, if you only let it and you just keep moving forward.
I walk around with a lump in my throat, quite often, almost every day. No one really knows that it’s how I really feel. I have early on, in my childhood learned to suffocate my tears to such an extent that I no longer show my emotions in public. Or in front of anyone for that matter. I don’t think this behaviour is healthy for anyone.
When I was 18 years old and graduated high school I joined a singing class, a piano class and yoga & meditation class. I was craving for so much creative and mindful exercises, it was crazy. I was juggling 3 classes and working full time, no wonder I felt as though I didn’t have time for all. Out of the 3, the yoga came first and then the singing class and lastly piano class. I never had the enough time to study for the piano class, which I really wish I had. The yoga class was a full on 90 minutes session that ended with 20 min of mediation. My teacher had been practicing yoga for over 25 years and he was Norwegian living in Sweden. I loved that class, it truly made me whole at the time when things were up and down in my life. The mediation part of the class made me curious, and at times frustrated. I sometimes would get cramp in my toes from the yoga class and there I was sitting and trying my hardest not to focus on my cramping toes, when everyone in the room were lying still and focusing inwards. Other times I actually was thinking of all the different sounds in the class room that I never had thought of. It was so quiet and peaceful, nothing like anything I had experienced before.
And sometimes I would get so into the mediation and felt all my emotions that had been lying stuffed underneath my conscious, coming up to surface, and all that came out was tears. I felt sad for the sadness in my soul. It was a dark room and everyone had closed their eyes, including the instructor, so I was safe – no one could see my tears. It was and has been very important to me for some reason, to not show those emotions, I needed to be strong but yet I didn’t feel very strong.
I have always wondered if the repetitive behaviour of suffocating my tears have lead me to always be very close to my emotions, I am always hyper sensitive to other people emotions and I’m very empathetic to all living beings.
Classical music, beautiful melancholic lyrics, a powerful speech, people in need, animals that are mistreated or someone saying a compliment or something truly amazing – all these things, they bring me to tears. A lump in my throat. Every day of every year. No exaggeration. A lump of sadness just lying there waiting to be found.
I’ve lately been wondering how to overcome this? If mediation is the answer? I think there might not be a way to overcome it, only ways to be more used to it and be able to control it. Not to hold the tears inside, and not to let them hold me back. They’re just as important as any other feeling.